Words and Music by Dottie Burman

Let me tell you about my boss.

She is very demanding. She said,

"Here's a project for you to do

Since the business is expanding.

We must reorganize the office.

You'll have two weeks to do it!"

Well that seemed like a reasonable

Length of time to get through it.

So I start by cleaning out the files.

Then I put all the papers into piles.

While I answer the email

And answer the phone

And I fax and I copy.

No problem! I'll handle this alone.

But oh there's so much to do yet.

Then after two days, my boss says to me,

"Aren't you through yet?"

Spoken: Two days? You said two weeks! I'll go faster!

Let me tell you about my boss.

She is tough and judgemental.She said,

"I have standards that you must meet.

This is simply fundamental."

We must redecorate the office.

It should be a reflection

Of the image I want to project

Of quiet perfection."

So I order new furniture and lights,

With the colors in muted grays and whites.

While I answer the email

And answer the phone.

And I fax and I copy

It's too much to handle alone.

But I don't want to upset her.

Sure enough she looks at the furniture and says,

Can't you do better?"

At night when I'm lying in my bed,

Her voice is an echo in my head,

And the problem is,

I believe every word that she said.

Let me tell you about my boss!

I've had it! I am leaving! I will quit!

Tomorrow I will tell her this is it.

Please let me be!

Wait a minute

I'm self-employed.

My boss ---is ME!